Women of Purpose and Passion

It's been almost five years ago now, when I got the call that made me a mom. "I've got some kids here, I think you need to hear about. I think that you would be a good match for each other." And so began a journey that continues today. It has not always been an easy road to walk. I went through several months of depression as my dreams of what motherhood would be synced with the reality of what motherhood is. During those early days, I cried out to God to please, please, give me friends, Lord. Friends who are moms, who love you and love their husbands. Friends who are passionate about things that really matter.

Which brings us to today. Today I am surrounded by friends, women of purpose and passion, who love God, love their husbands, friends who are moms. God has answered my prayers beyond anything I could have imagined.

I have friends who are passionate about unborn life. Who despite their fears of loss of relationship, loss of family, took a stand when women they knew were poised on the brink of ending their child's life. Sometimes a miracle happened and life was saved, family was strengthened. Sometimes, things did not work out the way we had hoped, and friendships ended, life ended. Regardless, I know that our Father will say to both of my friends, "Well done,
Daughter. You did what I asked. I will take it from here."

I have friends who are passionate about women and children caught in the horror of the sex slave trade. These friends actively raise money and awareness to help the victims of this horrible 'business'. One of them almost single handedly put together a 5K race which raised $7500 to help an organization in Germany which helps women escape slavery.

I have several friends who are passionate about orphans and those who are abandoned because they don't match the image that society demands. In fact, many of the friends I now have are now pursuing or have plans to pursue adoption...which as you know, is near and dear to my own heart. One of these dear friends has a passion to adopt, but instead of forcing her husband to march to her plans, she has entrusted the whole thing to God, and while she waits on God and shows the utmost respect for her husband, she is helping to raise awareness and money for orphans with Down Syndrome in Russia. These monies will allow families who want to adopt these children, but who do not have the required $25,000, to do so...uniting forever a child without hope with a family who will love them always.

I also now have friends who are passionate about motherhood, about raising and educating their children to love and serve our mighty God. These women also face rejection and criticism, for in our world today, those are not often qualities that are highly valued. Many times my friends have lost relationships because they stand firm in their convictions. But they continue to walk the path God has put them on, despite the pain and loss that they experience.

Which brings me back to today. God is calling me out of this proving ground, out of this safe haven of women who are passionate about the same things as I am. Women who have helped shape and mold me into the woman, the mother that I am today. We are leaving Colorado soon. Moving back to be near our families. On one hand, I am filled with joy to be close to my parents and my sister and her family. To be able to raise my children with their cousins, for you see, this too has always been a dream of mine. On the other hand, I am having to leave my friends. These sisters of the heart. But God has proven Himself faithful. I have seen what He can do, of how bountifully he answers the longings of our hearts. So I walk forward in faith, in obedience, and with anticipation! For now, not only do I have these dear friends behind me, still loving and supporting me, but the anticipation of what is before me.

Contentedness...Where do you find it?

Why is it so hard to be content? Why do we always want what someone else has? Seems to me, that should be something we conquer well before we exit high school, and yet here I sit, well past high school, and still at times, I find myself wishing...wishing for a leaner body, more hair, a day when everything I plan gets done! A day when I do everything right with my kids, a day when I love my husband up so much, that he never doubts his place in my life. A day when I don't disappoint someone with something that I did (or did not do)...

So what's a girl to do? Let's look at these one by one and try to apply some logic here:

1) leaner body - well, I could walk every day, even if it is on the treadmill and not outside; I could make better food choices, and not justify the yucky stuff I eat. That's a good place to start.

2) more hair - well, not much I can do about that! I just did not get the thick hair gene, guess I will just have to be thankful I have hair!

3) a day when everything I plan gets done - maybe the pronoun is the problem here. What about what God has for me today? Did I take the time to spend some time with Him, this morning, to hear what He thinks is important for the day? "The steps of a righteous man are ordered by the Lord, and He delights in his way." Psalm 37:23

4) a day when I do everything right with my kids - Maybe my kids need me to play with them, to curl up and read all day, or to not say, "Mommy's busy, I'll be there in a minute." (ten times). I know that these days are short and before I know it, my children will be out doing what God created them to do...I need to savor the time I have with them right now. And I need to cut myself some slack. Being a mom is hard work! Harder than I ever thought it would be. But I know that when I spend time with my Father, then I am a way better mother to the kids He has given to me.

5) a day when I love my husband up so much, that he never doubts his place in my life - And, look, here he is, at the end of my list again! I really need some help here, Lord! I so want to be the help-mate for my husband that I was created to be... it is my heart's cry.

6) a day when I don't disappoint someone with something that I did (or did not do)... - I think that too often, I let this one rule over the rest. I will drop everything to go help someone else, but does my husband get this same devotion? My kids? Sadly, they do not. So I guess what I am saying is that there may be more disappointment outside my house, but more contentment within. I am sorry (in advance), if I have to say 'no' to you, when you ask me for something, but I really need to get my priorities in order so that I can be the woman of God, wife, and mother that God intended in those long ago days, when He created me. "My frame was not hidden from you, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth. Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in your book they were all written, the days fashioned for me, as yet there were none of them." Pslalm 139:15-16

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Going Deeper

Lately I have been hungering for deeper relationships with my friends. To know each other and what our trials and successes are. To get connected on a level deeper than "who is giving us trouble with potty training" or "how exhausted we are". I long to have relationships with women with some years under their belts. With women who have experience and wisdom and a lifetime of walking with God, women with perspective, which is quickly lost amidst diapers, dinners and the din of every day life with little kids. I want my daughter to see me in friendship with other women, to see deep connections that span age, race, or any of the myriad things that divide us in todays society.

So, if you are one of my friends, reading this post, I am going to challenge you to take this walk with me. To be transparent and to help me do the same. To move beyond the surface stuff to deeper waters. I just had an image of an ocean. From the top, it is nice, the crashing waves, the myriad blues and greens that make up the color of the water. But, as soon as you go below the surface, a whole new world opens before your eyes, one that you will never experience if you don't get your feet wet (and your face - I am sure that there will be tears involved here!).

My sister wrote a post on her blog (http://jeffandmarianna.blogspot.com/) that I think adds to these thoughts, I hope you enjoy it - I know it brought tears to my eyes!


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